Dear Pickwick Mitzi

My problem is quite unique. I have a preteen Granddaughter, Allemai, that rides with me when school is out. I work as a Contractor Inspector for a State Agency and almost all of my workday is spent outside in various locations. Allemai is fantastic company and very congenial. We have one area of disagreement and it is huge.

I like to go by rural cemeteries and take my breaks there. My assigned work area is largely in an area that I grew up in and most of these cemeteries hold a former friend, kin, former schoolmate, or someone that I knew. By getting in the proper frame of mind most of these deceased can be communicated with. But it must not be rushed and there should not be any distraction while in conversation with them. Allemai does not like for us to stop at these cemeteries, she says it is spooky.

Sometime back there was a conversation with an Uncle that I owed some money for a possum dog. The dog was purchased for $10 to be paid as funds permitted. This was in the late 40s and this sum represented about one week’s pay. The dog did not immediately meet expectations and the Uncle died shortly after the purchase. The dog later proved to be well worth the sum and I regretted the unpaid debt, but not enough to pay the money to the estate. During one conversation at the Uncle’s grave he kept trying to say something about a dog and a date. He stuttered when alive and was even harder to understand now. I assumed he was talking about the newly opened dog racing track in West Memphis. Looking at his marker, it showed date of birth Jan. of 98 so I interpreted this as to bet on #19 in the 8^th race. His death was 11-50 so this meant to bet $50x11 or $550. Well #19 led at the 1^st turn then he stopped and went over to the fence and urinated. So Uncle belatedly got revenge.

Another conversation was with a former Hydro teacher, Abie. The school had two outhouses located on either side of the schoolhouse, one for either sex. One day Abie was on the throne in the men’s outhouse and I eased up and jammed a stick in the door. His reaction was anything but humorous and he placed the blame on RuJim and Wimpy which suited me fine. On one of my visits to Rabbit Ridge cemetery I contacted him and cleared it up, which seemed to set him at ease.

So, Mitzi, from these examples you can see the importance of these cemetery stops and seems to me Allemai should hitch up her belt and accept it.

Proud Pappaw In Michie

Dear Proud,

Your Granddaughter should be thankfull that you take her with you while you work. Many Grandparents wouldn't go to the extremes that you've gone. Sometimes these young children just can't grab the peace and serenity of a well kept cemetery.

I'm sorry about the revenge by your uncle. Some advice here is to watch the dogs that are being introduced. If you see a dog relieve itself then you might have a winner. I use binoculars for this purpose at the track. I know that I can't run a race when I'm in need of relief.

Your conversation with your former teacher must have made both of you feel good. It's a hardship holding those feelings inside over a long period of time, especially if your dead. I'll bet Rabbit Ridge cemetery is quite a place at Easter time. You could talk to your friends and have an Easter egg hunt at the same time. The Granddaughter should really enjoy that.

I showed your letter to a couple of my friends at our monthly AARP meeting and we all think we'll have our next picnic lunch at the mausaleum down the street.

Mitzy